Valentine's Day Boxes- A Sweet and Meaningful Tradition

When we think of holiday traditions we often think of events and customs around Christmas. Understandable as the Christmas holidays are often choked full of traditions. From carols, decorating our homes and tree to special foods we eat Christmas for most is a time of celebration and rituals. Traditions play a vital role in the lives of families and for the development of our children! They’re the threads that weave generations together, creating a tapestry of shared experiences, emotions, and values.

For our children, traditions…

1. Fostering a Sense of Security and Stability

   In a world that can often feel unpredictable, traditions provide children with a sense of consistency and security. Knowing that a certain ritual, like decorating the tree on the first weekend of December or baking special cookies, will happen every year creates a comforting rhythm to life. These predictable moments help children feel grounded and connected to their family’s values and culture.

2. Building a Strong Family Identity

   Traditions are a way of saying, “This is who we are as a family.” Whether it’s Sunday family dinners, lighting candles for Shabbat, or an annual summer camping trip, traditions shape the way children see themselves within the context of their family. They learn about their heritage, values, and beliefs, which contributes to a strong sense of identity and self-worth.

3. Enhancing Emotional Development

   Shared experiences foster deep emotional bonds. Through traditions, children learn to associate love, joy, and togetherness with their family. They also learn the emotional language of celebration, gratitude, and reflection, which is essential for emotional intelligence and resilience.

4. Creating Lasting Childhood Memories

   Traditions become the cornerstone of childhood memories. Ask any adult about their fondest memories, and many will recount moments tied to family rituals—holiday feasts, bedtime stories, or annual road trips. These cherished memories form the foundation of nostalgia and a sense of belonging that carries into adulthood.

As parents, we have the unique opportunity to shape our children’s holiday memories through meaningful traditions. One of my family’s favorite traditions is something we have named “Valentine Boxes.”

Nine years ago, I bought 4 empty boxes at the dollar tree. I assigned one box to each family member, writing their name on the top with a sharpie and thusly our valentine boxes tradition was born!

Every year on February 1^st I pull out our boxes and place them on the end of the kitchen table. I set a stack of paper I’ve cut into quarters and a couple pens next to the boxes. Each night at dinner everyone in our family writes something they love or appreciate about each person, themselves included, and places their notes in the appropriate boxes. It can be as simple as “I appreciate when you take the garbage out” or “I loved playing Catan with you this afternoon” or “I am grateful when you take the kids on an evening walk so I can clean up the kitchen in peace and quiet.” We repeat this every night until Valentine’s Day. Then at dinner on Valentine’s Day we open our boxes. We take turns reading aloud all the notes of love and gratitude we’ve received over the last 13 days. Some of the messages are sweet, some are funny, many are heartfelt. There is something special and incredibly powerful hearing out loud how others feel about you. Too often in our busy day to day lives and moments of pure survival getting kids fed, and out the door various activities we forget to take a moment to tell those we love most just how much we appreciate them!

Traditions are not just for holidays, though we often have them surrounding special times of year. However, traditions are so much more than seasonal rituals—they’re powerful tools for nurturing a child’s emotional and social development. They create a sense of security, foster identity, and build a treasure trove of joyful memories that children carry into adulthood. As you create or continue your family’s holiday traditions, remember that the simplest moments often hold the most profound meaning. In the end, it’s the love, laughter, and togetherness that children will remember most. If you are looking for an easy, meaningful tradition to start with your family I HIGHLY recommend valentine boxes.